Hi Pastor John,
Tonight’s meeting was so good. And everything that was said about expectations, and disappointments, etc., was just perfect and tied in perfectly with my prayers lately.
Last night I was driving home from work, and I was praying and trying to get my thoughts straight about things; in particular my life and not having been married and being alone, missing out on family, having a husband and so on. I just laid it all on the table before Jesus again. Usually, I end up protesting, and I will be frank about it – and I know this is bad, but I usually would pray, “I don’t agree; I don’t like this. I just don’t agree (with what you’ve done with my life),” and I would complain a lot. I didn’t do this with a bad attitude; I said it to be earnest before the Lord about how I felt – he is the only one that can deal with me about it.
Well, last night was different, and I don’t remember how I got there, but my prayer was different, and I was earnest about it. I was praying “Jesus, I agree with what you’ve done in my life. Everything you’ve done is right. You’ve always acted perfectly in my life in response to my actions and what I’ve done. I agree with you.” Pastor John, it felt so sweet driving along, praying that prayer over and over again. I felt the change in my heart about that, and I still feel it today. And I am so thankful for that. I’m glad I prayed earnestly before about how I felt – how “I disagreed”, but I’m gladder that I now agree with Him. I don’t want to lose this, so I am going to keep telling Jesus I agree with him.
Jenny