Good morning John,
Recently, I have been talking to God about having to spend so much time with medical things concerning my health since late June. It’s a life/world I have never known. It tires me out to have as many as five medical appointments in one week but we’re trying to find the cause for pain and swelling in my feet. I always end up telling God that I’m glad He knows what’s going on because I surely don’t.
I know Jesus sees us when we hurt physically and he also sees us when our heart is hurting.
When our meeting began on Sunday, my heart was hurting. Even though there were visible tears in my eyes, there were invisible tears from my heart; it felt like my heart was crying. As the meeting went along and the spirit was moving, people were standing and being blessed, I was still sitting in my chair with both arms raised. A quick “swish” from Jesus came by me and my heart responded, “I don’t know what that was God, but I want more of it”. Immediately I stood up and began staggering to the right and then leaned forward over on a chair (I think) and it felt like I was gliding across the floor. Once I was on the floor on my back, I could vaguely hear people’s voices and someone was praying for my feet, patting them and someone else was praying, patting my arm. My eyes were closed the entire time and I felt so restful and relaxed. Then my heart started talking to God saying, “You did this for me, you saw my heart crying, Jesus, did those tears touch you, and did you really bless me because you were touched, that was so sweet of you, Jesus, thank you.”
This morning (Friday) I woke up at 3 and immediately started thinking about my experience. It was so good, I went over it the second time in my mind and a couple of things stood out this morning.
Because my heart was hurting and I felt a Jesus “swish” come by, my heart immediately responded that I wanted that and more, immediately I stood to my feet and immediately started staggering, and immediately felt restful and relaxed, no thoughts, no hurt, no pain. That immediate response was a heart response, not any kind of brain response. My brain is sometimes slow and if a brain response was needed I definitely would have missed out. In fact, when that strong heart response was there, there was no brain anything; I had no brain. (Of course, we all know that responding to the spirit is a heart thing anyway). But it was good to have no brain thought to deal with, not even one split second.
Our brain or flesh sometimes likes to make excuses as to why we did a certain thing; skirt around an issue, or use many words to wear someone out. But when all that stuff is raked off, the only thing left standing is “The Heart”. We can’t get around that no matter how hard we try. Even though you have said that all these years (since 1984 for me), it seems that I understood it even better after Sunday.
Sheila