{"id":6024,"date":"2015-07-03T19:50:05","date_gmt":"2015-07-03T19:50:05","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/pjhmail.wordpress.com\/?p=6024"},"modified":"2015-07-03T19:50:05","modified_gmt":"2015-07-03T19:50:05","slug":"darkness-into-light","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/pastorjohnshouse.com\/mailbag\/6024\/darkness-into-light\/","title":{"rendered":"Darkness into Light"},"content":{"rendered":"

Good Morning Pastor John, <\/span><\/p>\n

I woke up this morning early and had the sweetest thought. Jesus really turned my darkness into light.<\/span><\/p>\n

I have fought depression for as long I can remember. \u00a0Even as a young girl I had a heavy sadness that seemed to follow me. \u00a0By 2010, I had been through multiple in-patient centers, seen multiple psychologists, and I cannot name all the medications I had tried. \u00a0I remember waking up and dreading seeing daylight. \u00a0I did not want to get out of bed, let alone have to try to function for another 12 hours. \u00a0I remember the day I called out to Jesus. \u00a0I was on my couch. \u00a0All the kids were gone for the day. \u00a0I lay on that couch for hours crying and wanting relief. \u00a0I had once met a person who told me about how God changed his life. \u00a0He said everything had fallen apart for him, his job, marriage, and his zeal for life. \u00a0Then one day after a really bad day, his truck broke down and he just crumbled. \u00a0He got out of the truck on the side of the road and just cried out to God. \u00a0He said he told God, “I can’t take anymore, Go! \u00a0If you are really there, then help me! \u00a0Take over my life. \u00a0I can’t take any more.”<\/span><\/p>\n

Then a peace came, and a rainbow appeared in the sky. \u00a0After that, his whole life changed. \u00a0Now, I was leery of this story, but for some reason I remembered this as I lay there sobbing. \u00a0I cried out to Jesus. I said, “Jesus, I don’t know if you’re real or not, but if you are, I need you. \u00a0Every day is so awful. \u00a0Help me, Jesus! \u00a0Please send someone to love my babies like I do. \u00a0I am tired, Lord, and I really can’t take care of them. \u00a0Please, Jesus, I am so tired.”<\/span><\/p>\n

Things got really bad for about two months after that. \u00a0I lost my home, and my children moved in with their dad and step-mom. \u00a0I lived on a relative’s couch. \u00a0It was during this time that I reconnected with Jerry. \u00a0I look back now, and I can see Jesus in every step. Then, I just remember feeling a little hope again. \u00a0Jesus did not instantly fix things. \u00a0He ever so gently removed damaged pieces. \u00a0Like a loving surgeon, my sweet Jesus cut and took out all that darkness, and added light.<\/span><\/p>\n

I woke up this morning excited for my day — excited to open the blinds — excited to live. Jesus really is the light. \u00a0Literally removing my darkness. Praise God! \u00a0I am so thankful for life, for light and for Jesus. I just wanted to share that this morning.<\/span><\/p>\n

Beth<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Good Morning Pastor John, I woke up this morning early and had the sweetest thought. Jesus really turned my darkness into light. I have fought depression for as long I can remember. \u00a0Even as a young girl I had a heavy sadness that seemed to follow me. \u00a0By 2010, I had been through multiple in-patient […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6024","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-netmail"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/pastorjohnshouse.com\/mailbag\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6024"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/pastorjohnshouse.com\/mailbag\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/pastorjohnshouse.com\/mailbag\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pastorjohnshouse.com\/mailbag\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pastorjohnshouse.com\/mailbag\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6024"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/pastorjohnshouse.com\/mailbag\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6024\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/pastorjohnshouse.com\/mailbag\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6024"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pastorjohnshouse.com\/mailbag\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6024"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pastorjohnshouse.com\/mailbag\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6024"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}